Toy Soldiers
On Dictionary.com, the word soldier is described as an active, loyal, or militant follower of an organization. Hmmm, so a toy soldier would be an active, loyal, militant follower of an organization, in which a child is controlling. This is really starting to feel like my current place of employment.
I feel like when I wake up in the morning, jump into the shower, and get dressed, I have to remember to grab the fuckin' strings to clip onto my back...Damn, another day in puppet land.
After a mild heart attack this morning upon receiving my December 20th paycheck, I head to a meeting with our "corporate trainer". For those of you who don't know, click here for the definition. Frankly, I have no idea either. Things start off great. The test says I am genuinely a good employee, good at dealing/working with other people, I have a lot of energy, and have a good balance of taking orders and giving orders. Then we move onto my current state of mind. Shit...why can't we just stop the meeting now. This topic is a hard pill to swallow, but I think to myself, "I can get through it"...Afterall, I've been told (2 times) that management would be willing to offer me a severance package, and help me "move to a position elsewhere(yeah, with another company) where I'm more happy". In the past, this only made me want to get better and prove them wrong. I must have had a bad burrito this morning or something, because it really pissed me off and made me think.
Apparently during the last 5 months of me trying to be the perfect employee, and not doing anything against the book, not only have I stressed myself out to the point where the trainer says to me, "This is NOT healthy, that's how people get ulcers and heart attacks", I've also apparently been getting further away from conforming to their chameleon-like culture. Talk about a downer, I wanted to crawl back in bed and start over. I just can't win here!
Maybe I will finally grow the balls and tell them what I really think about their fuckin' culture. NO, I really don't give a shit what every single person thinks about me at my job! How hard is that for you to understand? Is just showing up and doing my job not good enough these days? WTF? Jokers...
Well enough is enough, I'm off to drown my sorrows, suck it up, and go back to work tomorrow like nothing ever happened...already regretting it...I'm a toy soldier, victim of an inhouse drive-by...
If anything, take this great, simple quote away from reading this..."Don't sweat the petty stuff, and don't pet the sweaty stuff."
OUT
posted by Big T @ 5:17 PM
8 Comments:
At 7:35 PM,
Anonymous said…
or maybe your corporate trainer creates and manipulates drama in order to effectively communicate his/her worth to the powers that be. how about this quote, "imagine there's no heaven, it's easy if you try. no hell below us, above us only sky."
At 10:08 PM,
Big T said…
Wow, that's why I'll always have love for ya fantast...you always have a different outlook on things...keepin' me grounded...shiiiit
At 10:43 PM,
Anonymous said…
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
At 8:10 PM,
Anonymous said…
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
At 9:37 PM,
Big T said…
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
At 11:13 AM,
Big T said…
Anonymous - I appreciate your feedback. However, I'd appreciate a name with the comment. Common courtesy, ya know.
At 10:03 AM,
Megan said…
Tall, is someone hatin'? Lemme know, I'll take care of it... :)
At 2:21 PM,
Big T said…
Anonymous - Say hello to my little friend, the Meganator! Thanks Megan, I'll holler...
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